28th Surgery

After my last surgery at the end of August, I only felt good for about a month.  At the beginning of October, my pressure headaches returned along with vomiting, blurry vision, and seeing spots.  I sometimes have trouble walking again and now I am having dizzy spells.

My surgeon reached out to me at the beginning of December and said that he wanted me to come in but he was booked until the first week of January.  That actually pleased me because it meant my son and I could still visit our family in California over his winter break.  I knew traveling would be difficult on me but I also knew that it would be well worth it.  We would be cared for.

We didn't get to do as much as we would have liked, but honestly it didn't matter.  We really enjoyed being around our family.  We were there for two weeks and it was like time stopped.  I FINALLY met my nine month old niece/goddaughter and we got to spend quality time with my nephew.  I was even blessed to have spent time with my friend and my godson.  And I made several dance videos.  It couldn't have been more perfect!

Then it was time to leave.  We enjoyed our time so much with everyone that it was harder than normal to say see you later. I may have caused a bit of a scene outside of an IHOP saying bye to my brother.  Oops.

The flight from Southern CA to my house is two hours and fifteen minutes and I cried the whole time.  I cried until 2 am that morning on my hands and knees on the floor while my son was with his dad overnight.  Of course that made the pressure incredibly worse.  I couldn't even function the next day.  I kept thinking about how much I already missed my family and how I was missing out on so much of their lives and they are missing out on ours.  I won't see my niece take her first steps and let me tell you she is really close.   My nephew seems to have grown up over night and so has my godson.  My son is missing out on quality time with his cousins, aunts, uncle, grandparents, and great-grandparents. I understand that families move apart but it's been ten years since I left and it has not gotten any easier.  Especially while dealing with hydrocephalus on top of everything.

A few days after we returned, I had my appointment to see my neurosurgeon.  He has decided to change the abdominal valve for a lower pressure one.  Also it will be moved to my chest or neck.  This is an outpatient procedure that will be done on January 22nd.  I am dreading going back into the operating room for what will be my 28th surgery, but I am really hoping this does the trick for longer than a month because my son and I have lots of traveling to do even if it's just short weekend trips.  We want to be more present in the lives of our family and friends.

I still have dance videos to make with people around the country and I am determined to make that happen one way or another.  I don't know what my future holds for me.  What I do know is that after I have recovered from this next surgery, I am going to work on accomplishing some goals and do some soul searching.

So a big hug and thank you to all our family and friends in Southern CA.  We loved the time we spent with you all and we appreciate you taking such good care of the two of us.  Hoping to see you sooner rather than later!